Pirates and Lesbians

In a hypothetical world Rosie O'Donnell would host cruise ship full of lesbian and gay couples. Oh, wait she already did. Ok, in a hypothetical world the cruise ship left for the tropical paradise of, say, the horn of Africa. Doubts among you? In a hypothetical world Madonna was aboard and wanted a new baby. Ok, still not convincing. In a hypothetical world Rosie, Madonna, Brad, Angelina, and we'll throw in A-rod head to the horn of Africa for a gay African kid stealing trip (rich orphans that Oprah shows off). They see the State Department warnings but are reassured when Hillary steps aboard and assures them no chance of trouble in this area of the world. Bill telegraphs and says to them all, with an XOXO to Hillary, have a nice trip but watch out for the artic cap that is breaking away from Antartica (thank you Gore). Unfortunatelly, pirates have taken over the vessell and demand ransom. Rosie whines, Madonna sings (shot for anti any religion), Brad is waiting to hear what Angelina does, Angelina (they think she is mad, sad, mad, sad, mad, sad, then figure that Brad deserves out of the hostage situation Angelina put him through). So the pirates are now desperate not to piss off Harpo Productions, but still hold Rosie, Angelina and Hillary. The US Navy arrives and has no clear derective. You decide who is first. Or can we have that heroes welcome that involves three simultaneous sniper shots. Where is A-Rod you ask? He survived by giving his soul to the Yankees.